Thursday, December 10, 2009
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Today was the first snow of the season, at least in Virginia! it is so pretty, and just makes everything seem better. we have decorated our room and i have been listening to a lot of christmas music, but now i really feel like i'm in the spirit for the holidays! i am excited to go home, kind of. i'm just worried i will fight with my mom again like last time, but i'm hoping that since it's a longer break, that won't happen. anyways, let it snow let it snow let it snow!
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
I am SO frustrated. i absolutely hate being home. i know i sound like a brat, but it's true. my mom refuses to let me hang out with people, so i am trapped in the house with nothing to do. i am seriously close to tears out of sheer frustration. she thinks she has complete control over me even though i am a LEGAL ADULT. i try to be nice, but there is only so much i can honestly do. it has only been one day and i want to go back to richmond so badly, i cannot take this. and what am i going to do over winter break?! i cannot handle three weeks of my mom getting mad at me over the smallest things, like the tone of my voice, and then grounding me. I asked her what i did wrong, and she said "nothing, you've just done nothing nice." what does she want me to do???? i suffered through watching the grinch for the 15th time with them and hung out with my sister and her all day. all i want to is throw up. three days until i go back!
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
and i will be home!!! i am so excited, i miss my family and friends so much. but i also miss chicago like CRAZY and the midwest!!! many people look down on the midwest, but there is something about it that is more warm and comforting than the east coast. i don't know if that's exactly right, but it's how i feel right now. i just feel more at home there! i am only going to be home for five short days but i will make the most of it because it will be so much fun!!! on the other hand, tonight was fun because we went out to dinner to carytown burgers which was really good! it was so nice to get off campus, because it can get so boring and monotonous here. anyways i am counting down, fourteen days to go!!!!!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
my phone is broken!!!! i am so bummed, because it is only five months old...it was my first phone with a keyboard and i was ADDICTED. it is so hard not having a phone, especially being in college because i can never get in tough with anyone..so frustrating!!! my mom is sending up my pink razer phone from freshman year..that is going to be a rough transition because it is so old and slow and does not work well at all! the only partially exciting this is that my mom said i can get a new phone when i go home next, and she said i might be able to get a blackberry! :)
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
I just watched a really sad video on cyber bullying. this is a huge problem that people often don't think about, especially among middle schoolers and high schoolers. it is awful the way that kids are bullied these days, especially online, where it often cannot be seen or detected by adults and other people who can help. i don't know why, but i think our society has made kids even worse and more cruel to one another, maybe because of the media or what they are shown at home. it's important for us to show kids a good example and to love each other instead of spreading hate and violence. watch the video here
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
I have been so sick lately and i hate it. seriously, i have a cough that will not go away. i have had it for three weeks and it just keeps getting worse even though i have been taking medicine (robitussin...nasty). anyways, today i was coughing so hard i thought i was going to die because i couldn't breathe at all. i have no idea why this is so bad but it doesn't help that the weather can't make up its mind. last week it was nice and cool but today it is pretty much summer. i never thought i would say this, but i want it to be normal fall! crunchy leaves, scarves, and boots. i never thought that i would actually long for cold weather, but as i sit in my stifling room i can't wait for it!
Monday, October 19, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
So, i'm sitting in my room AT HOME listening to jack johnson while writing my core essay. uhhh it was kinda due yesterday, and of course it's pretty much midnight right now and i've hardly begun. it's like being back in this room brings me back to all my procrastinating habits. how did this weekend go by so quickly?! it was kind of nice being home, and i got to see a few friends, and of course my family. it was also very relaxing, up until now, but still i feel like there is so much more that i needed to do that didn't get done! i am absolutely dreading waking up at 6 tomorrow morning especially since i have at least an hour of work left and i am still putting it off. by the way, i didn't know "at least" was two words! my computer just auto-corrected it....weird. anyways, it was actually kind of weird being home. i mean, hinsdale has of course remained the same. but it was hard seeing my family. i guess by being away i ignore the problems that are there and it's tough seeing them again when i'm back. it makes me feel guilty even though i know that there is nothing i can really do. i don't know, maybe i need to call home and write more. on another note, i miss everyone back at school! it is kind of crazy, it has hardly been any time at all, but i'm excited to go back. that's a good thing i guess! alright, enough procrastinating, back to my essay i guess....
Sunday, October 4, 2009
So it was just family weekend and my parents and sister left this morning! It was good to see them, although kinda bad. I guess it reminded me how happy I am being so far away and getting away from all of my family problems because of course the trip started out with a fight. It's so hard, because I am always the family negotiator, but sometimes i cause the problem in which case i can't really help the situation. but this time, i could help so everything got better. i always understand both sides when my parents fight, and i think that this applies in most cases: things are hardly ever black and white. no one is ever completely wrong in a situation and no one is usually completely right either. anyways, next weekend i am going home for fall break, so the goodbyes weren't that hard. also i get to see molly next weekend! i am so excited, i hope my mom will let me out of the house a lot. it's going to be so weird going back to such strictness when i have been living with so much freedom. but oh well, it's only one weekend, and it should be fun!
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
I am so nervous about everything and i don't really know why. i guess i just feel panicked a lot, but i guess after time passes hopefully everything will be okay and things will have a chance to settle down. but at the current moment i just feel on edge about everything. i'm not even that worried about my schoolwork, i have been doing pretty well so far, but more about everything else. ahhhhhhhhh. that's all i can say
Monday, September 28, 2009
It has definitely been a while since I wrote! things are crazy at school. i love it, but i honestly don't have a spare minute. there is kind of a lot of homework, and i am trying to do really well so i don't want to get behind on anything! i am also playing club field hockey, and i'm in a couple of clubs. i'm also applying to be on honor council! i'm really nervous because i really want to get on it, but i know that a lot of people are applying :/. my application is due on friday, so i need to work on it a lot today and tomorrow! anyways, i'm also doing a lot of stuff with friends, i love the people here and meeting new people! there are a ton of themed parties, and last weekend friday was party in the usa (which was SO fun to dress up for since i am basically obsessed with that song) and 90s, which no one really dressed up for, people just wore a lot of weird things!
so today i woke up at 6:45 to go to a breakfast for this club that i'm in, but my friend wasn't ready on time and then we couldn't find the room, so we ended up being too late to even go! so frustrating! but then we saw our other friend at d-hall and had breakfast with him, which was great! i hardly ever wake up in time for breakfast, but i have discovered that i really like it! and i actually had energy for econ today, which is good because i am usually falling asleep! i had a midterm on friday, and we got our grades back. i got a B, which i knew i would get, so i'm not too disappointed even though i am really trying to get an A in that class. oh well, i'll try harder for next time! today i have to meet with dean, which i'm a little nervous about...anyways sorry this has been a pretty boring post! but i'm going to try to write more since i've been slacking
Sunday, August 30, 2009
So i have not updated this in a while, and now will be the time!!! college is going well so far, some parts are confusing you know and it takes a while to get used to but most of the time it is so much fun. I have met some great people, you just have to go with the flow and everything will work out i think! Tomorrow is the second week of classes ughh, but they are not too bad except for econ, which is a ton of reading! But yeah, I will write more about school later when I can think of something more interesting to say about it! I miss everyone a lot and home, but I am not homesick anymore which is good! more later
Friday, August 21, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
First of all, this is my family. Even though we fight sometimes and don't always get along, I love them so much and appreciate everything they do for me. I will miss them like crazy
These are some of my best friends, I don't know what I would do without them!!!!
meri, molly, lauren, and shannon!
Ahhhh what would I do without these people in my life? They mean everything to me.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
The day has come and I must say I am so so so sad. I am regretting not going to school closer, I can't believe I am leaving!!!! I am going to miss everyone so much, and I'm really nervous. I did not anticipate being sad or homesick at all but the past few days I cannot stop crying. I don't know what to do, but we are leaving in a few minutes so I will write more later. :((((((((
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Let's just say on monday I had to say goodbye to two of my best friends in the world :( it was so hard and I cried when I got home. I'm leaving sunday!!!! I am excited and I know college will be fun but I hate the goodbyes and the fact that the people I am used to seeing everyday whenever I want, just hanging out and doing nothing, I will not see for months. I am kinda nervous for college but it comes and goes. Today is my last day of work, so crazy! Last weekend I went to Lollapalooza which was insane but so much fun. The weather was awful but it was still worth it seeing great people and listening to great music! Everything was good but my favorites were ben folds, the gaslight anthem, rise against, and vampire weekend! It was a good last weekend of summer. This week is literally flying by so far, I just hope everything ends up alright once I get there! In exactly one week from right now I will be at college going through orientation, it is just so surreal. To be honest, it hasn't even really hit me yet, I don't think it will until I get there! In the days ahead, there will be more sadness and goodbyes, but they will not be forever. I'll keep you updated!
Sunday, August 2, 2009
I haven't written in SUCH a long time, i'm sorry. It is so easy to get busy with things and forget about other things. So this past weekend i went to michigan with my family! It was good and bad. It was good because michigan is beautiful and also i learned some things about my family and my obligations. I have not been taking full responsibility of things that I need to do and now I know that sometimes you have to make priorities and stick to them. The weather on friday was really nice and we went to the lake and pool and on a boat. Yesterday it was rainy which sucked but it ended up being nice in the late afternoon when we had to leave go figure! Anyways the reason it was bad was because we went last minute so i missed work and now i'm going to be in trouble :/ Ahhhh oh well. Tomorrow i think i am going downtown which will be fun! This week will be pretty chill. I think my mom is taking my sister to camp so it will just be my dad and me. I'll probably be working a lot though so i won't be home very much! Hopefully a good week ahead though, it is nearing the end of summer..
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
I wish i could be in france right now to celebrate!! im sure its crazy though. i am going to see the new harry potter movie tonight at midnight and im pretty excited! i wanted to reread the book before i saw it, but i didnt have time oh well. things are going pretty well. i have been getting along with my family lately which is a nice change! Nothing too exciting has been happening lately... Anyways my mom and sister are going out of town on sunday so if anyone is reading this please pray that they are able to go and that they have a safe and healthy trip! The rest of this week i am just hanging out and working and hopefully going to the beach on sunday! Best wishes to everyone.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Some things have been happening lately, i won't go into details, but lets just say that some of the people i always thought i could depend on have let me down. I dont even know what to think anymore. I am not a person who likes to fight or hold grudges so everything is fine again i guess but i feel like i cant really trust some people right now. I guess its not really a big deal, but at the same time it kind of is because people shouldnt treat other people badly and then expect everything to be alright again. Its hard to know when you should just forgive and forget or when you should actually be upset. But fighting is usually a waste of energy and is stupid for the most part. Sometimes i feel like when i make up with people im just acting fake though, because i am sometimes still upset on the inside, i just dont want to be in a fight. Anyways, i am going to lake geneva tomorrow which should be fun, but we'll see i guess. I hope its a good weekend because this is my weekend off from work! On sunday im seeing grease and im excited about that good luck shannon!!! Well i have to finish cleaning my room so thats all for now i guess
Sunday, July 5, 2009
I guess i haven't written in a while but everything has been pretty much the same. i am angry/upset about something right now but i wont talk about it, i would rather concentrate on the things in my life that are good. so on friday it was the third of july, which was SO much fun. I had to work, which really wasn't bad because i like most of the people that i work with. Then i got home and got ready then went to meri's house for dinner! Her whole family was over and molly was there too so it was so much fun. Her cousin told us all of these funny stories about her work and we were laughing so hard. Then some more people came over after dinner and we walked to the fireworks, which were really good!!! After that, we went back to meri's and more people came over too! Her aunts were over so mol and i danced with them since it is kind of a tradition. Then people started leaving but some more came and we went on a really long night drive which was fun! Then we went back to mer's and had a sleepover with my favorite people in the world. It was just an all around great day, i wish my entire life could be like that.
Monday, June 29, 2009
The summer days are going pretty well so far. The only bad part is work, I feel like I am going to school everyday and today I was thinking in my head omg is it only monday? because i get soo tired but i know if i wasn't working i would get really bored during the day. Anyways, i just love random summer nights hanging out with people. Last thursday i would say was the best night of summer so far just because it was so random and fun and i got to see a lot of people i haven't seen in a while! Sherry Sadler also made an appearance, only a select few will know what that means :). on friday i saw the movie my sister's keeper. I literally cried throughout the entire thing, and for many different reasons. One was that it reminds me a lot of my own life and how when one person in a family is sick, the whole family is affected. But the friendship between the two sisters was inspiring, and it made me sad that i am not closer with my own sister. So that is something to work on I guess! one good thing was that we saw my world lit teacher mrs colianni there! Soo awkward. But anyways, last night was amazing because i went to a concert with molly and meri and we saw my favorite band Jack's Mannequin!! This was my second time seeing them, but it still astounded me how amazing they were. Andrew Mcmahon's voice was absolutely perfect and you can just tell that he loves every second of what he is doing. I think that with all he has been through, his music is even better. He knows that life isnt easy and i think all of his songs have really good messages. the best part was when they played watch the sky because that is my favorite something corporate songs and its always really cool when they play a something corporate one!! Alright i could go on about this for hours but i will spare you..the fray was good too though. Today is sadly my only day off from work, and i actually still worked in the morning! But i'm looking forward to fourth of july this weekend, more later!!!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Happy father's day!! I decided to work this morning so I had to wake up at 7 o clock ughh which sucked, but lifeguarding is pretty easy in the morning since its just the swim team, so you don't really have to worry about anyone drowning! We just got home from brunch with the family which was okay. My mom's friend is visiting so she came too. Yesterday was a good day because I went to the pool for a little bit, then went to Chinatown for lunch! It was really good then we drove home and mer, lauren, and I walked around the polo fields for a little bit because there was a Scottish festival! Then I went to see a play at night with shannon and my sister. It was surprisingly good, it was a musical, so the singing definitley made it more interesting. It is unbelievably hot right now though, it is so humid even though it rains all of the time. So it is either burning hot with the sun blazing, or stormy. Okay, sometimes I don't like summer because you dont see people as much but I have realized that it is actually better because it is more exciting when you do see people. Even my close friends, we usually talk or text but I don't see them in person every day, but now when I do see them I am more excited to hang out with them so it is actually a good thing. I am not sure what I'm doing this week, but im probably working a lot, since im trying to save money for college and the future. Actually, my money is mainly for the future, because i doubt i will let myself use it a lot during school, but after I will need to worry about living on my own, feeding myself, and everything! I got my course catalogue in the mail last week and i think i'm going to take french, psych, econ, and core (it is a required freshman class, and its kind of like an english/philosophy class). I also want to take an intro to business class maybe, but we'll see, i need a couple of options in case the classes I want fill up. I wish i had a sense of direction in my life, or knew what kind of thing i should be. I would like to do something that helped other people, but i dont know what i could do. The only thing that comes to mind is doctor but I hate science..so thats kind of a problem. Well, anyways I guess we'll see what happens next year, and hopefully i'll get more of an idea! anyways this is extremely boring so i guess ill write more later byee!
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Sometimes it is so hard not to think about the past. I try not to, but it can just consume you sometimes, thinking about the good old days or how things used to be. I get so upset thinking about how much my life has changed and how my life would be today if some things had not have happened. Sometimes I think about the alternate universe version of myself, what would have happened if my sister didn't get sick. I wish I could still have a nice normal life. Sometimes bad things happen and they are hard to get over. I understand that, but what do you do if there is one bad thing that will never get better and never go away? How can you learn to deal with that? There is no way to move on because it is there, staring you in the face every single day and there is nothing you can do to change it. You can try to deal with it, and still make the best of your situation, but sometimes these things are easier said than done. Even when I take my mind off of things, I am just reminded of it again and it is a slap in the face. I guess the only thing you can do is force yourself not to think of what could have been, but merely except what is happening right now and make the best of your situation, because no matter how bad something is, there is always hope. There is always something. But I can tell myself this over and over, but still, it is difficult to actually truly believe it and live by it. I know that there are much worse things in the world and my life could be much worse, but sometimes it is hard to compare yourself to those things. I guess we just have to keep making the best of every day, and cherishing what we have now, because you never know when something will happen, and it is true that things can always get worse, so appreciate every day for what it is, because you never know when something can be taken away from you.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Sooo the reason I made this is because of my friend Jenn. She made one because she is going away to Taiwan for three weeks and this will keep her up to date with civilization!! I'm going to miss you jenn if you are reading this :(. Anyways, today was a bit boring, but I guess it was just a normal day of summer. It was my first day of teaching swim lessons, which is fun because I love little kids. although it is really tiring since the lessons are forty minutes long and you run out of things to do after about twenty minutes. But afterwards I came home and then went on a walk with my friend Molly which was fun!! Then I just came home and was bored out of my mind. I always feel like I am wasting summer away because i spend so much time sitting around being bored. But my mom always gets mad at me whenever I leave the house so that is really difficult, we fight about it a lot which I hate. I wish she understood how important my friends are to me because I don't know what I would do without them. So after I had family dinner I went out with some people except I knew my mom was mad so I was just thinking about that the whole time. I hate going out when I'm in a bad mood because I know that it isn't fun for anyone else. But anyways, we took a long car drive and listened to music, which is one of my FAVORITE things to do. I hate driving, but I love going for drives, which I know is unfair so I try to drive sometimes. But it is just so relaxing sitting in the car, talking and listening to music. Actually, I will probably walk to work tomorrow because I hate driving, the only good part is listening to music but atleast walking gives me something to do. I have to wake up at 8:05 tomorrow which sucks because it is summer and I can't even sleep in. So I should probably get to bed, sorry this was the world's most boring post ever!!!
Song of the day: Fairfax by William Tell http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4EjKElJlTY we listened to this in the car and it's really good! I wish I knew how to put the video right in here, but I don't sorry!
Song of the day: Fairfax by William Tell http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4EjKElJlTY we listened to this in the car and it's really good! I wish I knew how to put the video right in here, but I don't sorry!
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Things I Love:
- Summertime: especially lemonade, beaches, ice cream, lazy days, and strawberries
- Going on walks with friends in the lovely Graue Mill
- Dancing, to pretty much any music at all
- Car rides anytime and everywhere
- Running, especially in the morning (if i can actually wake up)
- 90s music
- disney channel movies
- Lilies, and most flowers
- When my dog is lying down watching tv with me
- Climbing trees
- Braiding hair
- Writing notes and getting mail
- Thunderstorms, especially in the mornings
- My friends :)
That's all for nowwwwww!!!!