Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Stuck in the Past
Sometimes it is so hard not to think about the past. I try not to, but it can just consume you sometimes, thinking about the good old days or how things used to be. I get so upset thinking about how much my life has changed and how my life would be today if some things had not have happened. Sometimes I think about the alternate universe version of myself, what would have happened if my sister didn't get sick. I wish I could still have a nice normal life. Sometimes bad things happen and they are hard to get over. I understand that, but what do you do if there is one bad thing that will never get better and never go away? How can you learn to deal with that? There is no way to move on because it is there, staring you in the face every single day and there is nothing you can do to change it. You can try to deal with it, and still make the best of your situation, but sometimes these things are easier said than done. Even when I take my mind off of things, I am just reminded of it again and it is a slap in the face. I guess the only thing you can do is force yourself not to think of what could have been, but merely except what is happening right now and make the best of your situation, because no matter how bad something is, there is always hope. There is always something. But I can tell myself this over and over, but still, it is difficult to actually truly believe it and live by it. I know that there are much worse things in the world and my life could be much worse, but sometimes it is hard to compare yourself to those things. I guess we just have to keep making the best of every day, and cherishing what we have now, because you never know when something will happen, and it is true that things can always get worse, so appreciate every day for what it is, because you never know when something can be taken away from you.