I need to post this hilarious link in my blog so I never lose it. If you need a good laugh just read through! I will never understand some people

So mad at myself

I hate myself I really do. I was so down and sad and in a bad mood all weekend which just made me extremely unpleasant. The reason I went home was to spend time with my mom and cheer her up but my mood got in the way and I basically acted terrible the whole time. Now I'm back at school and I miss her so much and it's like well I didn't even show her I loved her at all while I was actually with her. I cried so many times on the car ride back and couldn't breathe I almost had to pull over and I'm crying now silently in my bed. Why can't I control my emotions ever I hate myself I hate myself I hate myself I am so sad and unhappy I right now I just want to cry so much and I can hardly see as I type this why can't I just be the person that I want to be instead I ruin everything and make myself so miserable I can't stand it

I am so scared and worried that I'll be like this for my entire life. So sad and down and just feeling so worthless and upset all the time. It used to be that I was mostly happy and sometimes down but now it's like I'm mostly down and sometimes happy. Why do I get like this. I try I figure out what sets it off but I just don't know I hope I can find a way out of it

Bad reaction

Why did I come home I've been here for about 2 hours and I can't think or breathe just freak out and cry I just don't get why I am having this reaction it's worse than any anxiety attack I usually get and I have to hide it from my mom she wanted me to come home so badly I need someone to hold me and play with my hair and whisper to me it's alright I just need someone

Scared

I can sense a really big anxiety attack coming on. All I want to do is cry myself to sleep but that's not really an option with five roommates. Never thought I'd say it but I am so homesick I just do not want to be here at all

Words

Even one little word can bring a memory rush back to me and make me so, so sad. I hate how in matter of 30 seconds I can go from being perfectly content, reading a book, to sobbing and feeling so low.

Thoughts on Christmas

My Christmas is pretty much never normal. Ever since this horrible disease took over my family's life years ago. My sister is in the hospital for Christmas, but sadly, that is nothing new. This Christmas, I didn't really ask for anything. Opening up gifts was the farthest thing from my mind this morning. (I still haven't opened most of my gifts, just a few things from my mom). Anyways, in some ways, I am glad to have such a different mindset from mostly everyone I know my age. People were tweeting, instagramming, and texting about all of the things they got for Christmas and how excited they were to open their presents. The best part of my day was spending quality time with my mom. I really hate the holidays, but I know I might come to like them again. If I have to be thankful for something, I'm glad that I know what's really important in life rather than getting caught up in all the materialistic things like nearly everyone I know. I wish I could tell everyone just to stop thinking about what they are getting for five minutes and enjoy time with their family because those moments can be ripped away from your life without a moment's notice and you can never get them back.